A So you want to make baseball like golf, where they handicap each hole? You want to place handicaps on ballparks? The only comparison between baseball and golf that I want to apply here is, “Play it as it lies.” In other words, all ballparks are different and you play them the way you find them. If you hit a 420-foot out, tough for you. If you hit a 310-foot home run, lucky for you. Pitchers mound to home plate is 60 feet, 6 inches in all the parks and the bases are 90 feet apart in all the parks. That’s enough conformity for me.
Q How did the Reds acquire The Nasty Boys (Rob Dibble, Norm Charlton and Randy Myers) for the 1990 World Series champion team? – Carl, Arcanum
A Amazingly, all three of those relief pitchers were No. 1 draft picks — Dibble by Cincinnati in 1983, Charlton by Montreal in 1983 and Myers by the New York Mets in 1982. Actually, the Reds drafted Myers first, but he didn’t sign. Charlton came to the Reds in March 1986 for utility infielder Wayne Krenchicki and minor-leaguer Tim Barker. Myers came to the Reds in December 1989, along with pitcher Kip Gross, for relief pitcher John Franco and Don Brown (a minor-league player, not the Dayton TV broadcaster). Only the Myers-Franco deal was controversial because of Franco’s success with the Reds as a closer (and he continued his success with the Mets). But for the Reds, the trio of trades produced the U Can’t Touch This Nasty Boys.
Q Several years ago when the Reds played in Chicago, some of the players would stop in a city park and paint the horses on the statues of military men. What was that all about? — G.B., Washington Twp.
A That wasn’t just the Reds, that was every visiting team to Chicago, both leagues. And it was only one statue, that of Gen. Phillip Sheridan on a rearing horse. It was tradition forced upon rookies by the veterans that in the dead of night the rookies would sneak under the horse and paint a certain delicate part of the steed’s anatomy with the team colors. The tradition stopped when the city tired of cleaning up the horses and stationed lookouts to arrest the guilty parties. Can’t you just hear the Chicago police calling a manager to say, “Hey, your rookie of the year candidate is in jail and needs bail money. No, he didn’t stab anybody, he painted a cement horse’s ...”
Q Did ESPN pull the plug on their broadcast of the Reds-Nationals on Wednesday night after Stephen Strasburg left the game in the sixth inning? – Mark, Bloomington, Ind.
A No, but that’s certainly the reason they were there. It is unbelievable the amount of equipment ESPN ships in to televise one event. I counted five 18-wheelers parked in Great American Ball Park. Heck, all they needed was one close-up camera to focus on Strasburg. Bronson Arroyo was his opponent and before the game I told Arroyo, “Don’t worry, they are only televising the half innings that Strasburg pitches.” He laughed and said, “That’s probably the truth.”
Q Should the Reds make the postseason, who would you choose for the bullpen? – Reed, Philadelphia
A Given my choice, I’d take Coco Cordero, Arthur Rhodes, Brian Wilson, Joakin Soria, Heath Bell, Rafael Soriano, Jonathan Papelbon and Neftali Feliz. But six of those eight players pitch for other teams and I don’t think it’s possible for the Reds to acquire them by Aug. 31. And who knows who will be pitching well and who won’t by playoff time? Based on now (if the Reds make it), my bullpen would be Cordero, Rhodes, Nick Masset, Logan Ondrusek, Jason Isringhausen (if he shows he can still pitch), Jordan Smith, Micah Owings (so he can also pinch-hit) and Travis Wood (because they need another left-hander in the bullpen and he can also be a long man and emergency starter). Now they just have to get there.
Q If all goes well for Jason Isringhausen in the minors, what do you think will happen to Coco Cordero? – Tom, Fairfield
A I envision co-closers, depending on situations and availability, a nice option. And I can see Isringhausen, a right-hander, sharing set-up duties with Arthur Rhodes because the innings are piling up for Sir Arthur. Cordero, the one-man cardiac arrest carrier, has been better lately and is 26 for 32 in save situations. He will continue to collect saves and a very large paycheck.
Q Do you think Gary Matthews Jr. would be a better bench player than Chris Heisey, Laynce Nix or even Chris Dickerson? – Jeremy, Warsaw, Ind.
A Personally, I love what Heisey has given the Reds off the bench, a difficult job for a veteran, let alone a rookie who needs more playing time. And I love Nix for what he does off the bench. Dickerson spends more time in the trainer’s room than in the batter’s box and that’s a problem. Matthews hasn’t hit above .252 since 2006 when he hit .313 with 19 homers and 79 RBIs for Texas. I’d keep Heisey and Nix. General manager Walt Jocketty has my phone number, but not once has he called to ask me what he should do — a wise decision.
Q Johnny Cueto looked as if he could have used a towel pitching in that humidity Monday. Is it legal for a coach or manager to take a towel to the mound? — William, Northern Kentucky
A I’ve heard of throwing in the towel, but that’s ridiculous. Yes, a coach or manager could deliver a towel, but only once. It counts as a visit and a second visit with a towel would mean that Cueto would have to use it in the shower.
Q All major-league divisions have five teams except the National League Central, which has six, and the American League West, which has four. Has there been any discussion about moving Houston to the AL West to give every division five teams? — Jim, Hamilton
A This question comes up often. First of all, a team has to give its permission to change leagues and Houston is having enough trouble winning in the weak NL Central without moving to the American League. And the move would give both leagues 15 teams. See a problem there? One team in each league would have nobody to play, unless interleague was instituted year-round. You need an even amount of teams in each league (16 in the NL, 14 in the AL) so somebody always has somebody to play in its league. A better solution? Drop two teams from the NL and go with 14 in each league. Which teams? Well, to benefit the Reds, how about starting with St. Louis?
Q The Reds recently had eight quality starts in a row and I was wondering if the Reds had ever done that (doubt it) and were you amazed that the Reds only won three of those? – Tim, Stuttgart, Germany
A That just strengthens my argument that the quality start stat is bogus — six or more innings and three runs or fewer. A pitcher gets a quality start if he goes six innings and gives up three earned runs. That’s a 4.50 earned run average. If that’s quality, then so is a pair of socks made in Thailand. I believe the Reds not long ago had 13 straight quality starts, so it is not unusual — not under those parameters. Last season, Zack Greinke had 23 quality starts and was 13-10. Matt Cain had 21 quality starts and was 8-14. John Lannan had 21 quality starts and was 9-15.
Q As young as Mike Leake is and with all the surplus pitching the Reds have, wouldn’t it be prudent to move Leake to the bullpen to save his arm by reducing his innings in the second half? – Craig, Fort Loramie
A First of all, I love what Joey Votto said: “There is no such thing as surplus pitching. No team ever has enough.” So true, so true. Secondly, why ask a young rookie to do something he has never done and do it in a pennant race? And working out of the bullpen probably creates more stress on the arm — up and down warming up and being used three out of four days or even two out of three days.
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