Still, when news that members of the book club would be arriving inched up the angst, I didn’t respond in as sympathetic as I might have.
It’s not for nothing that the term “annoying husband” is a redundancy.
On the way to carrying out what few duties I was either qualified for or could be herded into, I found a wonderful release in dispatching with a couple of cobwebs that had taken up residence in the recesses of our second floor stairwell that could be seen only with the aid of the Hubble Telescope.
I hadn’t been aware of just how effective balled up socks could be in tackling household chores. I downed the enemy cobwebs in 15 seconds and still had half a dozen ordnance left in the arsenal. (Keep an eye out for my name in Hints from Heloise.)
Unlike the ice that still clung to our sidewalk the day of the gathering, all anxiety melted away when the guests arrived.
Apparently giddy at being rescued from the spectre of lurking cobwebs, they went about socializing with such convivial gusto that — irony of ironies — I was called on to bring the group to order.
A habitual yacker, I’m especially sensitive of this weakness when I’m in a group of women, not wanting to dominate the conversation like a guy who enters a room sizing up the length of hair of the women present to determine which would be easiest to club and drag home.
As most of the women had hair of short or moderate length, anyway, I switched my focus to serving as guide through our guest’s poetry, suggesting poems that might show off her range.
I was effective enough that, when we broke for food and conversation in the kitchen, none of the requests for cutlery included a knife with which accessorize my back.
We’ve lived in our home for 27 years now, since our younger child was 2. And although I know it will be the condition of the furnace and dishwasher, the age of the central air system and the storm windows that will be on the mind of the eventual next owners, I somehow want them to know that on a warming February day at the end of a particularly stern stretch of winter, the hovel that I call home was the site of a gathering of friends that warmed me in a way no furnace rated for energy efficiency ever will.
So, what could be more important to know about a home?
Contact this reporter at (937) 328-0368.