McGinn: When did ’80s songs become the oldies?

I suppose it should make me feel self-conscious — or at the very least, make me aware of my own mortality.

But every so often, when I’m getting my hair cut and the stylist sticks the tip of the clippers in my ear to shear off the stray elongated hair or two, I don’t really think much about it.

Yes, I’m at the age where I have strands of hair crawling out of my ears.

Big deal.

To tell you the truth, I intentionally keep them long, too, just to get that warm fuzzy feeling of having the stylist stick the tip of the clippers in my ear.

Yes, I’m a dirty old man.

Big deal.

Like I said, I suppose it should make me feel self-conscious, like the time — and I’ll try not to get overly gross here — that I very briefly dated this girl in college and while kissing in my dorm room, she abruptly stuck her tongue in my ear.

“Ooh,” I giggled, “I like that!”

“All guys do,” she responded matter-of-factly.

Now that made me feel weird, as I distinctly remember thinking right then and there, “My God. How many ears has this woman licked?”

But having my ear hair sheared off by a complete stranger is no biggie. It’s life.

In fact, very few things make me feel like I’m actually going through the process of aging.

I still feel 17. If it weren’t for this sorry excuse of a beard — after three years, I still can’t get the mustache to connect to the rest of it — I’d still look 17.

But once in awhile, I’ll come across something that reminds me that I am, indeed, aging.

Rapidly.

On a recent road trip to visit family in Iowa, I turned the radio to a familiar Des Moines station, but was surprised to hear John Waite’s 1984 song “Missing You.”

“Hmm,” I thought to myself, “they must have changed formats.”

I thought about switching stations — do I sound like a John Waite fan? — but my wife already was singing along.

And then we heard it.

This was, in fact, the same station it’d always been.

It was still the “oldies” station.

I turned to that station expecting to hear stuff like “My Girl” or “Jumpin’ Jack Flash” and instead got “Sunglasses at Night.”

“How can this be an oldie?!” I complained. “We were alive when this song came out.”

I answered my own question later on in the trip when, passing through Indianapolis on the way back to Springfield, we came across a station doing an “all ’80s weekend.”

We knew every song, and each one came with some sort of recollection.

“Oh, I remember couple-skating to this one,” I yelled out when a really awful Chicago power-ballad came on.

“Oh, I remember trying and trying to tape this one off the radio,” I exclaimed as we drove down I-70 singing Poison’s “Talk Dirty to Me.”

We were all smiles as we thought back to a past that always seems better than the present.

And like the Grinch’s heart, my ear hair grew three sizes that day.

Contact this reporter at (937) 328-0352 or amcginn@coxohio.com.

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