I’ve always had a good relationship with my ex-spouse, but this would be a very awkward situation for me and the other family members. Do you think I should go ahead and honor my daughter’s request?
A No. While her feelings are understandable, she should also be respectful of how difficult this would be for you. Her enjoyment should not come at the cost of a very unpleasant situation for you and others at the gathering.
Explain to your daughter that while you respect her feelings about wanting her dad at the party, she also needs to be sensitive to your thoughts on this matter.
Children’s wishes and feelings should not always take a priority over the needs of others.
Q My 11-year-old daughter is having a sleepover for her birthday and most of the kids, including my daughter, have cell phones. All they seem to do when they are together is spend time texting rather than interacting with each other. I find this rather annoying, but it is very common among her peers.
Is it reasonable for me to limit their cell phone usage during the sleepover?
A While texting can be enjoyable and entertaining, it can also be distracting and socially inappropriate. What a great message to tell kids that you would like them to have fun and interact with each other, rather than their phones.
This is all about communicating and enforcing your values, rather than doing what is popular.
Here’s a great idea I recently heard from a mom. On the invitations to the sleepover, the parent indicated that all cell phones would be placed in a basket near the door, to be picked up when the sleepover was over.
Of course, kids could use their phones to reach their parents in an emergency, and parents were given a phone number to contact their children if needed.
Q My 2½-year-old does not seem to be developing normally. This is my first child, so perhaps I am overreacting in some ways.
I’ve taken him to the doctor on several occasions, and he told me we should wait another six months before having my son evaluated. I don’t understand why waiting is good.
A Contact your family doctor, and ask for a referral to a developmental pediatrician or a developmental psychologist. Competent and compassionate physicians are never threatened by seeking another’s expert opinion.
If your child does have any developmental problems, it’s critical to identify and treat them early.
Next week: Disconnected from your child?
Gregory Ramey, Ph.D., is a child psychologist and vice president for outpatient services at the Children's Medical Center of Dayton. For more of his columns, visit www.childrensdayton.org/ramey and join Dr. Ramey on facebook at www.facebook.com/drgregramey.
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