D.L. Stewart exclusive: Shipwrecked? Blame your t-shirt


While vacationing in Florida last week, I bought a long-sleeved T-shirt at one of those tacky souvenir shops that cater to tacky tourists. (In my defense, it was a bitterly cold day with the high temperature barely in the 70s).

The front of the shirt consisted of three nautical symbols, along with some latitude and longitude numbers which I assume had something to do with the Gulf of Mexico. And, affixed to the front, was a bright yellow sticker containing the following message:

“CAUTION!

“NOT INTENDED FOR

“NAVIGATIONAL USE!

“Manufacturer disclaims responsibility if teeshirt is used as navigational aid and cannot be held liable for any damages, including shipwreck, loss of life or limb, or any inconvenience.”

“Have a nice day!”

I assumed the sticker was intended as a funny little joke.

But my wife contended it was put there as a serious warning because there really are people dingy enough to navigate a boat based on information they found on the front of a T-shirt. Not to mention an armada of attorneys who would file lawsuits on their behalf.

I’d like to think I was right.

But I’m afraid she was.


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