It’s that time of year again (yes, already)! In keeping with my tradition of shirking traditions, I am in the process of preparing our year-end family letter to send with our Thanksgiving cards, but “letter” is a bit of a stretch: Family Top 10, 2013!
10. Cub Scout Critters: A hunter/trapper visits a Cub Scout meeting.
“When he made a reference to showing the boys some animals he trapped, I ignorantly assumed they would be in a cage. Alive. So, when a floppy, unresponsive muskrat was pulled from a box, an audible gasp escaped me. The boys all oohed-and-ahhed and inched closer to the dead-as-a-doornail critter. More non-breathing animals were presented – one bleeding from a trap injury, a few already skinned — to a room full of Cub Scouts who thought this was ‘the coolest thing ever!’”
9. Creative Writing: Our son learned to write, and illustrate, a personal narrative.
He chose to write a story of an incident I’d like to forget. It was titled: “I Thro Up.” Let me translate: “I Throw-up.”
8. Princess’ Preschool Progress Report: Notes from the teachers.
“‘She believes in following the rules and likes to make sure everyone does the same.’ Meaning: Miss Bossypants is a tattle-tale. She is also learning to write her full name. She is a young three (late summer birthday) so fine-tuning her motor skills is a work in progress, but she does well writing her first name. Her last name though — “Princess Who Wears Undies” — may take a while to master. Maybe next year …”
7. Welcoming “Waffles” to the Family: “Our son continued to pursue his dream, ‘Can I have a dog? How about now? Now? Maybe tomorrow?’
‘No. No. No. No.’
And then it happened. I was overcome with something: Mom Guilt. This kid loves animals. Maybe it will be good for him …?
‘Mom, can I have a dog?’
6. Spring break staycation madness: The things moms say …
“I said some things to my kids last week that I never thought would come out of my mouth. Ever. But, they needed to be said:
“Get the dog leash off of your sister!” This one is self-explanatory.
“Put the banana down now!” I don’t even remember why this needed to be said.
“And just what am I supposed to do with a turd at the ballpark!?” Let’s just say this had nothing to do with our new dog.
Next week: Top 10 Moments, Part 2