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Latest from D.L. Stewart

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D.L. STEWART: New law may help keep Swiss lobsters out of hot water

Posted: a day ago

Adding to its reputation as the most pacifistic of nations, Switzerland has outlawed lobster boiling. As reported this week in USA Today, a law that takes effect March 1 makes it illegal to plunge a live lobster into a pot of boiling water. Violators will be subject to up to three years in prison. The legislation was adopted as a result of...
D.L. STEWART: Is this new app the perfect answer to a wife’s questions?

Posted: 8 days ago

After decades of producing apps that will do everything from locating your car to determining the ripeness of a watermelon, technology finally has come up with something useful. It’s an app called Echo Look that tells women how to dress. And while It’s been described as “essentially an Instagram husband for single ladies...
Building a chain that links us all together

Posted: 10 days ago

Listening to the politicians’ ongoing arguments over immigration, something occurred to me: If it had been illegal for immigrants to bring other family members to this country 100 years ago, there would be no me. Because I’m a byproduct of what’s being derisively called “chain migration.” The first link in the...
For Chief Wahoo, it’s time
 Now that Chief Wahoo is being forced into retirement after more than 70 years of faithful service, I’d like to say a few words in defense of the Cleveland Indians’ mascot. — His origin can be traced to Louis Sockalexis, a Penobscot Indian in honor of whom the Cleveland Naps changed their name to Indians in 1915. —...

Posted: 23 days ago

Now that Chief Wahoo is being forced into retirement after more than 70 years of faithful service, I’d like to say a few words in defense of the Cleveland Indians’ mascot. — His origin can be traced to Louis Sockalexis, a Penobscot Indian in honor of whom the Cleveland Naps changed their name to Indians in 1915. —...
D.L. STEWART: Scattered applause for a motion picture’s reminder
 When the movie ended, the audience applauded and I couldn’t have been more surprised if a notice had appeared on the screen announcing that popcorn was going on sale in the lobby for 25 cents a box. To be sure, it wasn’t quite a standing ovation. Not the kind whooping and screeching you’d hear if Oprah or Ellen had declared...

Posted: 29 days ago

When the movie ended, the audience applauded and I couldn’t have been more surprised if a notice had appeared on the screen announcing that popcorn was going on sale in the lobby for 25 cents a box. To be sure, it wasn’t quite a standing ovation. Not the kind whooping and screeching you’d hear if Oprah or Ellen had declared...
D.L. STEWART: Real men wear short coats because being cold is cool

5:00 AM Saturday, Jan. 20, 2018

A letter writer to the chief fashion critic at The New York Times asked a question in last Tuesday’s edition. “My son is in college in Maine,” AMY, PELHAM, N.Y., wrote, “and the temperature is frequently below zero. It seems like every woman is swathed in an ankle-length black puffer coat from November to March. So...
D.L. STEWART: Tired of the daily grind? Talk to your gadget!

5:00 AM Saturday, Jan. 13, 2018

Because walking across a room or tapping on a keyboard requires way too much energy, technology is providing exciting new solutions to rescue us from the brink of our daily exhaustion — digital assistants. As the Associated Press reported this week, “From your couch you, you can now ask the Echo’s Alexa assistant to play...
D.L. STEWART: A problem for the ‘too-much-stuff generation’

5:00 AM Saturday, Jan. 06, 2018

Like most members of our generation, my wife and I have spent a lifetime accumulating stuff. We have walls covered with art work. Armoires stuffed with crystal, fine china and silverware. An attic filled with holiday trappings and photo albums. There’s not a flat surface in our house that isn’t littered with picture frames, candlesticks...
D.L. STEWART: Getting on board for some family time together
 On the day after Christmas, my 13-year-old grandson asked, “Grandpa, want to play this new board game I got?” I couldn’t have been more surprised if he’d said, “May we have Brussels sprouts for dinner tonight, please?” Because in my experience the current crop of 13-year-olds does not play board games....

5:00 AM Saturday, Dec. 30, 2017

On the day after Christmas, my 13-year-old grandson asked, “Grandpa, want to play this new board game I got?” I couldn’t have been more surprised if he’d said, “May we have Brussels sprouts for dinner tonight, please?” Because in my experience the current crop of 13-year-olds does not play board games....
D.L. STEWART: Sometimes a song is just a song

5:00 AM Saturday, Dec. 23, 2017

In the current atmosphere, no man in his right mind would make light of sexual misconduct. Nor should we. Still, it’s tough to ignore the “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” controversy that has been raging for years … even though I didn’t know it had been raging for years until last week. Until then, the only thing...
D.L. STEWART: She hails “kale,” but he craves “pizza”

5:00 AM Saturday, Dec. 09, 2017

In her well-intentioned, but largely futile, campaign to make me “eat healthy,” my wife took me to a new eatery for lunch the other day. (“Eatery,” by the way, is the fashionable word for places where you shuffle along on one side of a counter while servers on the other side of the counter force you to select from...
D.L. STEWART: Shaken, but not stirred, by current cocktail concoctions

5:00 AM Saturday, Dec. 02, 2017

My wife and I went to a fancy restaurant recently and decided to have a cocktail before dinner. When I asked the server for the drink menu, she handed me a list that consisted of 10 choices. Not only had I never heard of any of them, I had no idea what a lot of the ingredients were. One drink called a “Gin & It & Juice,” for instance...
D.L. STEWART: The road to Heaven may not be paved with iPhones

5:00 AM Saturday, Nov. 25, 2017

The most egregious example of cellphone addiction, I always thought, was the video of the bride who pulled her phone out of the bodice of her dress to answer it — while the ceremony was being conducted. Now I’m not so sure. Based on a recent story in the New York Times, it could be the woman who used her iPhone to order a pair...
D.L. STEWART: ‘Last class’ creates plenty more room for concern

5:00 AM Saturday, Nov. 18, 2017

Boarding an airplane is traumatic for me. It has nothing to do with a fear of flying. I’ve managed to put that in the back of my mind, although any time there are 10 or more consecutive seconds of turbulence it vaults to the front of my mind. My concern is walking through the first class or business section and looking down on the passengers...
D.L. STEWART: Turkey with purple grain roasted beets? No thanks

5:00 AM Saturday, Nov. 11, 2017

America’s values once again are under attack. The customs that made this the greatest country on Earth are threatened. Our very existence as a nation is imperiled. In other words, people are messing with Thanksgiving again. For most of our history, Thanksgiving has been a holiday beloved by real Americans for its no-nonsense menu &ndash...
D.L. STEWART: You can just call me the Grandpa National Bank

4:00 AM Saturday, Nov. 04, 2017

A recent article in this newspaper alerted readers to the fact that senior citizens are especially vulnerable to scams. The story listed ways for them to avoid being bilked, including monitoring bank accounts, freezing credit reports and screening fraudulent phone calls. But if seniors really want to keep their retirement funds lasting as...
D.L. STEWART: America protests the loss of its sauce

4:00 AM Saturday, Oct. 14, 2017

Children cried. Cops were dispatched to hold back angry crowds. Lawsuits we’re threatened. Boycotts were called for. America was in turmoil once again. And who could blame it? Because this has become a country without Szechuan sauce. Well, not exactly. There probably still is enough Szechuan sauce on the shelves of America’s supermarkets...
D.L. Stewart: ‘Baby on Board’ buttons may be a sign of the times
 Probably the most disturbing news item I read this past week that didn’t involve pro football concerned Baby on Board signs. The story wasn’t about those yellow signs that decorated the rear windows of cars a few decades ago — a phenomenon I never understood. What was I supposed to do, I always wondered, only have collisions...

4:00 AM Saturday, Sep. 30, 2017

Probably the most disturbing news item I read this past week that didn’t involve pro football concerned Baby on Board signs. The story wasn’t about those yellow signs that decorated the rear windows of cars a few decades ago — a phenomenon I never understood. What was I supposed to do, I always wondered, only have collisions...
D.L. Stewart: First we’re hacked and then we’re hacked off

4:00 AM Saturday, Sep. 16, 2017

Millions of Americans are angry. After credit reporting service Equifax got around last week to mentioning, “Oh, by the way, 143 million of you Americans currently are at risk of having your lives financially ruined because we screwed up,” a lot of people got upset. But not necessarily as upset as they were when they heard the...
D.L. Stewart: THIS one’s the record to chase
 With people in the Far East wondering if the next North Korean missile might land on them, folks in Florida and the Caribbean still bailing water out of their living rooms and 143 million Americans hoping their credit rating isn’t hovering somewhere around zero, this may be the most trivial of issues. Still, my major concern today is...

7:14 PM Wednesday, Sep. 13, 2017

With people in the Far East wondering if the next North Korean missile might land on them, folks in Florida and the Caribbean still bailing water out of their living rooms and 143 million Americans hoping their credit rating isn’t hovering somewhere around zero, this may be the most trivial of issues. Still, my major concern today is...
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