YOU BETTER GET OVER HERE AND CLEAN UP THIS MESS OR I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL PASSIVE AGGRESSIVELY SIGH AND PICK IT UP MYSELF.
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) May 11, 2017
Me: "Thinking about going to bed early tonight.."
— CurrentlyCaprece (@MommieKnwsFresh) May 3, 2017
My kid: pic.twitter.com/Q30GQuBz6Y
My daughter wrote, "I will see you every day of our lives," on my Mother's Day card, so I guess we've resorted to threats now.
— Stella G. Maddox (@StellaGMaddox) May 8, 2016
If you like to spend 100s of dollars every week on groceries but have nothing in your refrigerator, then raising teenagers might be for you.
🎭ᑌᖇᔕᑌᒪᗩ(s)🎭 (@3sunzzz)
Guys, don't stress over what to get your wife for Mother's Day; she'll make it sound way more thoughtful & generous on Facebook anyway.
— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) May 11, 2017
Me: Why is the Salad Spinner on your little sister's head?
— Ms. Havisham (@MissHavisham) April 6, 2017
Kindergartner, blankly staring back:
Because I didn't want to wear it.
Sign your kids up for sports so that they can get exercise, and drive-thru for dinner.
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) December 6, 2016
My toddler asked me to help her take her sock off and I helped her take her sock off. So naturally, she is pretty distraught right now.
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) May 6, 2017
Being a mom is kids banging on your bathroom door like SWAT, asking for a drink, while you're in the shower.
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) May 11, 2017
And Dad is in the kitchen.
Women have 9 months to prepare for birth. Paper cuts JUST HAPPEN
— 🎃Mattzilla™️🎃 (@mattZillaaaa) May 7, 2017
6yo: You're the best mommy
— The 21st Century SAHM (@21stcenturysahm) May 5, 2017
Me: Aw, thank you!
6yo: I mean, I guess. I don't have any other mommies to compare
Happy Mothers Day to me