SpringfieldNewsSun.com

SPRINGFIELD, Ohio — Call me old fashioned, or maybe I expect too much, but are thank you notes no longer a part of proper etiquette?

With the holidays come and gone, winter's indoor weather gives parents the perfect opportunity to sit down with our children and teach them the importance of writing thank-you notes.

After all, didn't they just receive a stocking full of goodies?

I am sure Santa wouldn't mind some recognition for his efforts in contrast to his regular barrage of "gimme notes."

I fully credit my mother for instilling this tid-bit of self-discipline in my brother and myself (thank you, Mom).

What better way to show your appreciation than to give a few moments of your time to thank the person/people who considered you on a special occasion.

Even a simple, "Thank you for the _____" in writing, means more than a phone call or e-mail (although they may suffice for temporary recognition).

What happened to this simple act?

I know, I know — we're all too busy. But really, how long does it take in the grand scheme of things?

We have plenty of time to watch TV, play Nintendo and eat.

It was brought to my attention that the importance of writing thank-you notes had taken a back seat when my husband and I received one obviously written by the mother of a child old enough (and I mean plenty old enough) to handle the task. She even signed her child's name.

I tried to be "OK" with it, but honestly, I'd almost rather not even receive one. (Just don't expect us to acknowledge your next big moment.)

A wise man once said (in a nutshell) — "Give without expectation."

If you don't want to give back, that is perfectly acceptable — you don't have to, but please, be kind and acknowledge when you have received something (even if you don't like it).

If it involves a monetary gift, a thank-you note may also provide peace-of-mind to the giver who may wonder if their check was stolen or lost in the mail.

I remember moaning and groaning about having to sit at the table and write out these notes when I'd much rather be enjoying the gift I'd received, but now I understand why Mom made me do it.

As preschoolers, my kids are "writing" or at least signing their names — as they don't quite know how to read and write yet — to thank-you notes before the gift is even out of the box. OK, maybe not that fast, but at least within the next week or two.

We try to make it fun, using construction paper, card-making kits, crayons and pretty colors. So what if the letters aren't lined up perfectly, at least the time was taken to be gracious.

"Focus on ... honest sentiment. Get creative. Turn what could be hours of boredom into an event they want to take part in — and in doing so take some of the burden off yourself," says the Emily Post Institute.

"Keep it fun. If you view this as drudgery, so will the kids."

Like I said, yes, there are exceptions to the rule — someone ill or incapacitated, a tired mother at home with a newborn (maybe Dad can step up here?) By etiquette standards, newlyweds even have a year to send thanks for wedding gifts (way too long in my opinion, just get it done.)

Of course, if you are able to thank the gift giver in person, maybe a thank-you note isn't necessary unless you feel compelled to do so.

However, if at a hectic child's birthday party, you aren't sure your child expressed his/her thanks or that it was heard, a thank-you note can't hurt.

It's impossible to expect a note of gratitude 100 percent of the time, but it shouldn't be acceptable to allow a child to grow up expecting things without learning to appreciate them and the kind people behind them.

Contact this reporter at (937) 328-0356 or dmjordan@coxohio.com.

What do you think about sending thank-you notes?