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Best mother-in-law joke ever
Heard a hilarious joke the other day:
Mothers-in-law — can’t live with ‘em; can’t fit ‘em in a blender.
The humor is especially topical for me these days: My mom-in-law, whom I love dearly, really I do, has been staying at our house for nearly six months now. Oops, I mean six weeks. It just SEEMS longer.
No, I’m kidding about that. Really I am.
Last month, Grandma Helen had a bad fall (at church, of all places) and cracked her shoulder bone. Ouch! She’s 82 and really needed help during her one-armed recovery. So we packed her up and moved her into the baby’s room. Which we formerly called The Grandmas Room, anyway, so she felt right at home.
See, both of the grandmas in our family live far away, so their typical visits last a week or so. One week never seems long enough, though, and the kids always beg them to stay longer.
But this time, she had a chance to settle in and get her fill of the craziness that two working parents and three busy kids can create.
Yes, she saw dirty dishes, unswept floors and mounds of laundry. She had to maneuver around scattered toys and piles of clutter with her cane. She was dragged to basketball games, a school art show, the science fair. She was witness to myriad sibling squabbles and even a few mom-dad spats (but we won’t dwell on that).
She was the perfect patient. She endured five weeks of physical therapy without a complaint and did her recommended exercises religiously.
She was the perfect guest, too. She ate what we served, entertained the kids with her old-timey stories (she really did walk uphill both ways to school!) and kept me company during my endless hours of insomnia.
She makes a great pot of coffee every morning, and she’s been giving me sage advice about not spreading myself too thin (too bad I can’t take it). More importantly, she has a great wit — she even laughed at the joke about the blender.
Now she’s on the mend and heading back this weekend to her home in the hills of West Virginia.
She says she’s leaving with mixed emotions: She’s eager to get back to her many friends and Friday night bingo. But she’ll miss having her three youngest grandchildren kiss her goodnight.
Although she probably thinks her extended visit was a burden, it feels more like a blessing.
We’ll truly miss her. And her coffee.
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